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Watching Sex and the City always throws me for a good one.

The show gets a bad rap sometimes. I think mostly by people who haven't actually seen it. It does have the fantasy aspect of spendy fashion and some monied individuals and that helps with it being entertaining, but the meat of the show is truly about heart. Relationships, friendships, work, family, dating, marriage, children. A healthy dose of sex, for sure, but 95% of the time it's dealt with it's in a humorous fashion.

I don't know about anyone else who watches the show, but I can't help reflecting on my own life when watching. Perhaps that's why it was so massively popular and still has a devoted following. There's something in the writing and subject matter that is universal. I had to wonder.....

My dating life (or, lack of one) has been on my mind a fair amount since being here in Bellingham.* When I got here I decided to really set out and meet single men in the area. And well, not only single men. I suppose just networking in general was something I wanted to focus on. Seeing as how I turned into a hermit the last couple of years in Fresno, I thought it important for me to put myself out there in this small town. Why the need for a change in social behavior?

To be completely honest, because I am average. I believe, though of course I could be wrong, that the average person is an individual looking to find a romantic partner to share lifes experiences with. Eventually settle in body and mind, perhaps have a family. Grow older together.

It's definitely what I hope to have in my future. Sadly, in my recent past I felt like I was never going to find someone to have something serious with. There isn't anything happening currently that suggests it's in my future, but I do hold some hope that it exists somewhere. That hope is something new.

A recent posting by jentwo posed an interesting question: Do you believe in The One or in the idea of soulmates?

I really feel like the idea of The One is false and is perpetuated by popular culture. Music, movies, books. The idea is sweet and fantastical and may move book and movie ticket sales, but I just don't think it very realistic. Is there a guy out there that is meant specifically for me? I don't believe so. Is that a bad thing? Nope. One of my favorite quotes is from Candice Bergen's character in an episode of Sex and the City and is something I thought simple, yet quite profound.

"That's the key to having it all. Stop expecting it to look like what you thought it was going to look like."

Wise words, I thought. I won't ever lose that need for foolish romantic interaction and saccharine sweet intimacy, but the part of me that thought I was going to find 'that perfect guy' is a little more realistic. Perfection is not real. Everyone is imperfect. What would be perfection is finding that guy I can find some common ground with, to be on the same page of that cheesy romantic novel with.

*As well as a great many other things, mind you. Work, career, family. Everything, really.

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( 3 comments — Leave me a comment )
Oct. 15th, 2009 04:13 pm (UTC)
Before I ever watched it, I thought Sex and the City was just a shallow show about vapid sluts in NYC. Then I actually gave it a try, probably in season 2, and was surprised by how much I liked it.

Carrie drives me NUTS sometimes and I have no interest in the fashion, can't relate to the desire for $300 shoes, etc., but you're right: the core of that show really is about heart and very real relationships. There is so much I can relate to, and it's made me cry on numerous occasions. I have the complete box set and plan to sit down and watch it all from the very beginning once I get a TV and DVD player. I'm debating whether or not I want to make Andrew watch it with me. He's made me watch countless things I wouldn't otherwise have anything to do with. :-P
Oct. 16th, 2009 05:22 am (UTC)
Hahaha! Ohhh, yeah..... definitely introduce him to the show! Everyone resists at first, but they just need that first taste.

Funny you should mention how much Carrie can annoy you. DEFINITELY. Her probably more than the others, however, one thing I like about the show is how flawed all of the main characters are. Much like any average person. They aren't perfect, and sometimes you wanna shove their $485 shoes down their throats :p
Oct. 16th, 2009 06:17 am (UTC)
He's always talking about how he wishes he had a group of girlfriends to have a spa day with, so I think there's gotta be an IN there somewhere. Certainly more with him than with some of my boyfriends in the past. ;-)

As much as Carrie can annoy me, I can also relate to her spazzing out over men, because I do the same damn thing! There are parts of Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha I can relate to, easily.
( 3 comments — Leave me a comment )

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